What is a Soulmate, Really?

Photo by Taha Raef on Unsplash

Soulmates are at the heart of my novel, Lonely Dove. The protagonist, Anji, is in search of her soulmate, and in the process discovers her twin flame. But, what exactly is a soulmate? Or a twin flame?

Let me start by defining soulmates, the topic of which is vast. I attempted to define this in the book, in a couple of places. In the first one, Margarita, who becomes Anji’s spiritual guide, explains to Anji the following:

“There are many types of soulmates, my dear. Some are romantic and others not. Soulmates are people we have deep connections with.” p 51

To simplify, a soulmate is anyone who comes into our lives, romantic or not, who makes us feel seen and understood. Soulmates help us view ourselves and our lives in a deeper way. They can be a lover or partner, but also a parent, a friend, or a pet. Later on, Sophie, Anji’s best friend says:

“A soulmate is someone you share love and respect with, and someone you can be authentic with, showing all aspects of yourself — even the ones you are not proud of.” p 188

Some soulmates are lifelong; some are temporary and come for small “lessons;” others are from previous lives; and there are even soulmates who do not bring about positive experiences. Sometimes impactful negative experiences are the result of soulmates who push us to expand or evolve in…